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Stop That Whining!

An Expert Shares Tips and Advice

By Elizabeth Pantley

: My daughter is constantly whining at me! Every time she calls "Moooommmeeee!" I have this great desire to change my name or run and hide under the nearest bed! Please don't tell me, "She'll out grow it," because if the whining continues, she may not make it to her next birthday! What can I do to make her stop whining?

: Talk about fingernails on a blackboard! Whining has got to be the ultimate in annoying childhood behavior. Because a whining child sounds worse than a frenzied siren alarm, we tend to do anything to make it stop. Thus, our little whiner discovers a great way to get our undivided attention. Here are a few suggestions. Try out several of them until you find your best solution.

: Never, ever respond to or give in to a whining request. Make an announcement: "When you use your normal voice I will listen to you." Then turn your back to the whining child and make it obvious you are ignoring her by singing or reading a book out loud held in front of your face. If the child continues to whine, repeat the same sequence without engaging the child any further. (Pleading or discussing will only increase the whining.)

: Help your child by modeling what it is you want to hear. "I can't understand you when you use a whining voice. Please say, 'Mommy, may I please have a drink?'" You can even be creative by pretending not to understand the whiny voice. "What? You want some spinach?" (Usually, a crystal-clear voice will correct you.)