As soon as 2-year-old Kendra moved out of her crib, she began wandering into her parents' room at night. Brenda Clark, her mom, would put Kendra back in bed, get her a drink, and reassure her that there was nothing to be afraid of. Often Brenda went through this routine several times a night.

"Kendra had a rail on her bed, and we used a night light with her as she didn't like the dark," Brenda explains. "I even tried painting her room the same lavender blue as ours so she would feel more secure." But nothing worked. One year later Kendra is still making her way into her parents' bed at night. Now the problem has become complicated because 2-year-old Josh, who moved out of his crib a month ago, has become a nighttime wanderer as well.

"Typically, if a toddler has been sleeping through the night until this point and has just started coming to his or her parents' bed, it is because of two possible reasons," says Dr. Susan Bartell, a child and family psychologist with a private practice in New York. First, he may start to have nightmares. As toddlers develop independence, their life experience expands and so do their fears, frequently causing nightmares.

"If their nightmares wake them up, they will, of course, run for Mom and Dad's bed for comfort," says Dr. Bartell. "Parents will probably find that this will happen around the same time every night because the sleep/dream cycle will be the same, providing the child's bedtime is the same every night."

The second reason also has to do with a toddler's growing independence. Dr. Bartell explains that as the toddler begins to explore and move farther from her parents, she may feel ambivalent about this and her struggle may result in conflicted needs for comfort and dependence, which expresses itself in nighttime wanderings.

Clark says that that she would like her children to learn how to sleep alone -- that she believes that it is beneficial for their own sense of identity and self esteem. But she also wants them to feel loved and secure.

Sometimes parents have mixed feelings about their baby growing up and when he arrives at their bedside at night it makes parents feel "needed," Dr. Bartell says. If the parents feel ambivalent, the toddler may have difficulty feeling safe about his developing independence.

Dr. Bartell says that it's extremely important for parents to help toddlers feel better about their independence by encouraging them to sleep in their own beds. If parents want their toddler to sleep through the night in his own bed, then as tired as that parent might be she must take the toddler back to his own bed.

"When you take him back to bed, be insistent, calm but not angry, that he needs to stay in his bed," says Dr. Bartell. "You may need to pat him, hold his hand or stay in the room for a few minutes so he feels safe."

But sometimes special situations arise that may cause a toddler to feel less secure and, consequently, create sleep problems. Judy Gibson, mother of three in Maryland, says that her youngest son, Mathew, liked to take a favorite blanket to bed with him. Gibson also let him keep a pacifier until he was about age three. But after she discovered that he was putting the whole pacifier in his mouth, she was afraid he might choke and had to take it away from him.

"We had about three weeks of sleep problems," Gibson says. "Then he was back to his routine of simply lying in bed and going to sleep. Thank goodness for the blanket!"

Another common situation arises when a new baby joins the family, says Dr. Bartell. The toddler may be jealous, anxious and needy and his sleep may become disrupted, especially if the new baby sleeps in the parents' room. "While you still need to encourage him to sleep in his own bed, and work on it, it may take a while before it happens," she says.

Letting the toddler cry for a few minutes at a time is okay, and will ultimately teach the child to be self-soothing, rather than relying on the parent to get back to sleep, Dr. Bartell says. "But I don't think any baby should cry indefinitely because it is scary for a child and may make him feel abandoned."

Dr. Bartell has several other suggestions that might help. Make the crib or bed welcoming with sheets and blankets that the child chooses, for example, with characters from Sesame Street or Blues Clues. Comforting toys and pillows can help too. During the day, tell your toddler many times that "everyone sleeps in their own bed at night" and go through all the members of the family and where they sleep.

Elizabeth Pantley, author of Perfect Parenting, suggests creating a "Bedtime Chart." Use a large piece of poster board on which you number and illustrate each step of the bedtime routine. For example, put on PJs, have snack, brush teeth, read five books, go potty, turn on night-light, kisses and hugs, go to sleep.

"Post the chart at child-eye level," she says. "Allow the child to lead you through the step-by-step process. After a week or so the routine will be set, and bedtime will flow smoothly."

If your toddler won't stay in bed, she suggests that a parent calmly and quietly tuck the child back into bed. "Don't talk, just make the easily recognizable 'shhh' sound -- that means be quiet, go to sleep," Pantley says. "Take a few minutes to rub your child's back and wait until he is comfortable again. Then you can usually leave him to fall back to sleep."

For parents, sleep is a precious commodity. "Most of us feel we don't get enough sleep, and we'd be thrilled if someone sent us to bed!" says Pantley. But a toddler's point of view "sleep is purely and simply an unwanted interruption in a life full his or her life."

Gibson remembers having to carry her son back to be many times. "Eventually he learned I was serious about him staying there and he did," Gibson says. "Most nights, anyway."